I love this shirt a loooot, bless the fan that sent it to him
I wish I was pretty but like actually pretty, not “my friends and family think I’m pretty because they’re my friends and family” pretty
it’s not you’re* or your*. it’s all Mine. everything is Mine
parents making sex jokes
grandparents making sex jokes
nine-year-olds making sex jokes
Welcome to tumblr where we go from parents making sex jokes to sassy Hitler in 0.6 seconds
yeah that’s true, but is it tru
Mom: Home in 5 minutes, hope you’ve taken the chicken out of the freezer
me: mom, can i-
which character do you think of when you hear,”a total asshole but very hot as well”
Disneyworld needs to make a rollercoaster based off of the ride Yzma and Kronk take to the lair. When the ride starts, Yzma’s voice yells “pull the lever, Kronk!” and the ride starts to move backwards so she yells “wrong lever!” and it shoots you forward.
WHY IS THIS NOT HAPPENING?!
Me at da club
When you’re enjoying your day off and you remember you have homework.
Fast repliers are the only people going to heaven